


Black Cats Bring Bad Luck

by ziasann



Series: a world without you [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BokuAka hints, Computer Genius!Kenma, Game Programming, Grieving, Isolation, Kuroo died and Kenma brought him back, M/M, TsukkiHina friendship, is this angst?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-22
Updated: 2020-08-22
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:15:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26044837
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ziasann/pseuds/ziasann
Summary: Kozume Kenma went through the five stages of grief over his best friend's death.It still wasn't enough."A world without Kuro was something I cannot accept and live in." Kenma admitted, "I had to make amends with my reality, so a world where I can still see Kuro...""...For that, I'd compromise."
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou & Kozume Kenma, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Series: a world without you [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1890631
Comments: 21
Kudos: 54
Collections: Recommended KuroKen Fics





	Black Cats Bring Bad Luck

**Author's Note:**

> Companion fic to Project Black Cat. This was basically Kenma's perspective. 
> 
> I didn't research much on game programming, AIs, and VRs. So this is really unreliable and purely fictional.

**_There are five stages of grief that were first proposed by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross in her 1969 book, On Death and Dying._ **

> **I. Denial and Isolation**

"Kenma, honey." 

His mother creaks the door open slightly. Never invading, but letting Kenma know she was there.

Not even one of his consoles was booted up. All their batteries drained, left unsaved game progresses. The player abandons quests mid-story.

Kenma would prefer to abandon the main quest for today too.

He hides more under his pile of blankets, the sheets rumpling as he tossed and turned. If only he could disappear more underneath, despite his mother never touching an inch of his hair.

Kuro will definitely pull the blankets off him and open the curtains to invite the stupid sunshine inside his bedroom. Kuro always made sure Kenma received enough sunshine for his body to produce Vitamin D naturally.

The footsteps of his mother were light but heard. Her weight dips on the side of his mattress, and this was one conversation Kenma never expected he'd encounter in his life.

"I prepared your suit, just in case. Don't worry, they'll understand if you're not going." She said, her hand patting his head on top of his covers. Despite being bundled thick, she managed to grasp where his head was. 

Kenma wanted to say thank you at least, but the moment his mouth parted, a sob choked out. 

The tears streamed down, and his mother probably noticed. His door shuts, and there were hushed discussions between his mother and father. The typical comment of  _ kuroo is kenma's best friend, of course, this is hard for him _ . Kenma was glad his mother understood he wouldn't attend the funeral. He can't deal with any more staring and pity as he tried his best to bottle up these emotions.

Kuro was so stupid, he knows Kenma doesn't like the attention. Now, Kenma was getting texts from every Nekoma VBC member. Kai checks up on him especially, but also on everyone since he assumed the captain's duties. Yaku complains how Kuroo was an idiot that God took him first before he'd destroy the world. Funny, but only for a moment before Kenma remembered Kuro will save the world accidentally because he's that type of person. 

Inuoka sends memes much more constantly than before. Appreciated, but Kenma did not know how to reply. Lev, as annoying as he was, splurges Kenma with messages asking about his well-being. The first year's concern was duly noted, but it stabs Kenma a little bit deeper when the  **_pls eat your food :' >_ ** mails from Lev started to sound like Kuro's  **_c'mon kitten, eat your food before it gets cold_ ** .

_ Even if I ate as healthy as you...you were so healthy, Kuro. Where did it go wrong? _

Kuro had a better lifestyle than him. Kuro was more energetic than him. Kuro was fine the last time Kenma asked, _ yet why?! _

Why was it all too late when Kuro fell unconscious in one practice? Why won't he wake up? Why were they calling 911? Stupid Kuro was just tired -there's no need! Why was Kenma in the hospital? Why was Kuro announced DOA? What were the doctors saying about aneurysms? Why were they all sorry and comforting him how Kuro had it swift and painless?

Kuro did experience pain. Kenma witnessed it, how Kuro ranted about his headaches. They both chalked it up to his preparation for juggling his captain duties, academics, and college examinations. 

Kuro didn't have a chance to enter the universities he applied for. Kenma knew Kuro has a high probability of entering any course he desired.

Kuro didn't have the time to decide which path he should forge on his career.

Kenma's phone vibrated under his pillow. Maybe his parents had arrived at the funeral and the team accounted for how Kenma wasn't there for the wake. Probably a series of texts offering comfort and companionship that Kenma didn't know how to respond.

He unfurled his covers, staring at the windows with the curtains closed. He should stand and let the sunshine in. Kuro will reprimand him if not.

Kenma crawls out of his bed, his safest place. He'd do this fast so he can get back, sleep everything away. 

Before he could hold the edge of his curtains, his computer stood frozen on the corner. Its screen is devoid of life, nor any game playing. No music, no surfing the net. Only pure black and blank.

The wheeled chair was in his direction, like begging to be seated upon again. 

His fingers never reached the curtains. Instead, Kenma dived in the computer chair. The wheels skidding towards the LCD screen. He pushed the START button, palm sashaying the mouse in various motions. 

The monitor lights up, Kenma squinted his eyes at the brightness of it. He clicked his internet browser, fingertips flying over the keyboard as he searched for the right keywords.

He tells himself this was only out of curiosity. There was no way to bring Kuro back, but  _ what if? _

**basics of game programming**

**making artificial intelligence with personality**

**can AI be installed in virtual reality?**

* * *

> **II. Anger**

**_Contrary to popular belief, the five stages of loss do not necessarily occur in any specific order._ **

Many of his classmates and friends, especially from Volleyball, visited Kenma. He observed how the Nekoma team always surrounded him, trying their best not to leave him alone. Coach Nekomata was also lenient in training, not pushing Kenma hard in practices. Maybe it was endearing and nice, from being a kid always left alone to a person who cannot be left alone. 

Kenma didn't have time to socialize though.

As soon as he reached the house, he ate proper dinner because he needed those for a long night. He trudged upstairs, dived into his room and booted up his computer. 

He dabbles in the stock market, while also uploading his old streams. Money easily flows from those, apparently. He's going to need every resource for the project to succeed. After a month of researching and reading articles, Kenma had managed to understand the framework of how to execute his idea. 

Several applications were running on his screen, Kenma was grateful he invested good processors in his PC. The world-building in games was tedious, but Kenma's universe will be as close as it can be to reality. There were numerous references to review from. All he had to do was follow the steps the game developers Kenma admired took.

According to the instructions he summarized from articles of programming, Kenma's artificial intelligence only needed personal touches and it will be ready soon. He perfected the character algorithm of the AI, which was the most meticulous part but Kenma memorized Kuro since childhood. He calculated which answers Kuro replied to certain questions. Inputting that tantamous amount of information, however, was taxating. 

His mother shouted something from downstairs. He didn't pay attention to it as he asked questions on the AI. Kenma was deciding on its name. All artificial intelligence had names right? 

**> AI, what should I call you?**

**> ** **_The most handsome and smartest guy in Tokyo._ **

Kenma paused for a second, frightened and at the same time marveling how accurate the response was to Kuro's attitude. There was a knot in his throat being known but he gulped it down. 

He was in the middle of typing in  **> i'll call you a pain in the ass** \- when there were two unfamiliar knocks on his room. 

Kenma swiveled his chair, about to ask the person behind his door. The voice revealed itself before Kenma mustered the energy for socializing.

"Kozume-san, it's Tsukishima Kei. From Karasuno."

_ Weird.  _

Kenma didn't expect that but he can run off a list of possibilities why Tsukishima Kei was visiting him. He hoped it wasn't to recall their memories about Kuro because Kenma expected much better from Tsukishima.

"Come in," Kenma said, not thinking of the mess his room was in. He was just ready to get this interaction over with.

The tall bespectacled blonde entered his room, not minding the clutter. Straightforward, placing an object on his study desk. No breaching of personal space. As soon as Tsukishima laid down the device near his mouse, the Miyagi student peeked at his screen. 

Kenma did his best not to show any guilt about it. Tsukishima may be smart but his screen only had a small scale of Kenma's planning.

He realized then that what Tsukishima handed him was Kuro's gray 32 GB flash drive. 

"I borrowed it last training camp, I was asking for some references with read blocking. He gave me that." Tsukishima explained. 

"Thank you," Kenma said, his eyes fixated on the storage device. Presumably full of stuff about volleyball.

"I'm not gonna be long here, we don't have much anything to talk about," Tsukishima stated, to which Kenma nodded.

"But," There was always the  _ but _ . "There's something you need to see in there. Didn't open it, but it's sure for you."

Tsukishima exited with a curt bow and pleasantries with his mother downstairs. Kenma didn't wait for the gate of his house to creak, before plunging the flash drive in the USB port.

Kenma and Tsukishima didn't have much to talk about, yes. But if he's the one saying Kenma  _ needs  _ to see it, he trusts Tsukishima's word for it. They're both people of few words with weight in their truths.

Kenma pondered for a brief moment if it was conceited of him to think that Kuro liked this kid because they're similar in nature. 

**< KT's Mass Storage Device in, scan for viruses? >**

**> No.**

Kuro, even in his files, was still neat. The folders were arranged properly. From volleyball club files to schoolwork, and family pictures. The only thing sticking out like a sore thumb in the pile was the folder labeled as  **kk** . 

For Tsukishima to assume  **kk** meant Kozume Kenma was brilliant. Was Tsukishima trying to help him? And what if he was wrong?

Kenma clicked the folder. Turned out Tsukishima Kei was a really brilliant person and not wrong. 

Scrolling through the contents of the folder, Tsukishima could be mistaken about one thing. 

**kk ** could also be interpreted as Kuroo and Kenma. 

Their pictures from childhood, many that their parents forced them into, some taken when they're both not aware of the camera, were collected in this one folder. Kenma was rolling fast, the photos loading how they grew up together. The lump in his throat dragged heavy again, their last picture was a selfie from their match with Karasuno at the Nationals.

Kenma gripped his mouse tight, copied the  **kk** folder on his computer. As the files were transferred, Kenma slid back to his personalized AI application. 

**> I know what to call you now.**

**> ** **_Pray tell, kitten._ **

Kenma tasted salt in his lips as he types out the first step of his project.

**> AI Kuro.**

With the photos Tsukishima presented him, Kenma can finally proceed onto scaling AI Kuro's three-dimensional figure in the software. 

That will be a much more grueling task to overcome. 

* * *

> **III. Bargaining**

**_Throughout each stage, a common thread of hope emerges: As long as there is life, there is hope. As long as there is hope, there is life._ **

Kenma has been in contact with several companies, from small sponsorship in his streams, game development research centers, and another one of his sub-project for his dedication to volleyball. 

Third-year was busier than ever. He refused the captainship duties before school even began. Kenma reasoned out how he wanted to prioritize his college entrance tests. They all understood, and a part in Kenma whispers that maybe Nekoma offered the position in Kuro's memory. Sweet, but also bittersweet pity. 

Nekoma once proposed to visit Kuro's grave before their first volleyball match outside school. Kenma declined, he wasn't ready for any kind of confrontation like that. Since he was also kind enough to be eating lunch together with the club, they all gave him a free pass. 

Everyone does since Kuro physically died. Kenma used its advantage of having more time to himself (and his projects). 

Kenma utilized all the resources he could, including the time and energy spent on this. Visiting the cemetery will ruin his tight-packed schedule.

His games were stacked neatly on the shelves, those not helpful for his research on the drawers. He kept his PSP to escape social interactions outside, while his other consoles were boxed. Unless, of course, he plucks them out to mirror references in his virtual scenes. 

He didn't talk with AI Kuro much after their first trial, Kenma can't chat with the bot without itching for a touch he realized. Kenma wasn't aware of how his proximity to Kuro will also play a vital role in his VR. A challenge that he will try to overcome once he tries the beta testing.

This semester break, Kenma wrote the outline of his main project and sent it to young Japanese programmers and professionals. A shot in the dark, but Kenma chose young people since they're more reliable with things they're passionate with. Kuro did teach him on how to convince people with great ideas, all Kenma had to do was execute it. 

He checked the time,  **1:04 PM** . He plucked his phone to set the timer, ignoring college university emails and his barrage of  **23 unread messages** . Kenma will not have the leisure to test again once the break's over. Graduation will arrive sooner than later, and his projects must sustain his financial needs soon to prove to his parents he didn't need a college degree to earn money.

Kenma crossed off another line in his list of objectives for his projects. The last major part of his main project remains in black bold sharpie. 

**\- beta testing**

His curtains were closed, Kenma feels like he's forgetting something. He scans his room, cleaned weekly by his mother three months after the funeral. She doesn't scold him, but she also leaves the curtains open as much as possible. 

Kenma blinked his eyes, maybe the fatigue was ticking off his instincts. His list was about to be complete, all Kenma had to do was click his mouse. 

**< Initialize the program? >**

**> Yes. **

Kenma wore his cheap VR headset, the timer diligently counting the seconds that will soon pass by.

* * *

Hinata was worried.

He was sure Kenma read his visit this break, the other even replied a short 'okay'. Hinata followed the time and date in their texts. He was excited to meet the setter again since their practice match. 

Hinata noticed Kenma's stress a long time ago, he understood Kuroo's death wasn't easy considering the two were best friends since childhood. Kenma's replies were shorter, Hinata had to initiate the conversation for most of the part. Not that it was hard with Kenma, but Kenma barely updates him anymore. Hinata tried to be patient, he really did.

His anxiety only increased during their previous match, Kenma tosses the ball without much expression. Hinata's source of worry, however, was the evident stress on the other's golden eyes. Kenma was a calm person in the court, but his set-ups were weird. Tsukishima noted it the day after in their fifteen-minute pause from practice.

" _ Yesterday, Kenma's sets were like hmmmmmm _ ." Hinata never meant to voice it out loud but Kageyama already caught up. 

" _ True. His tosses were poorly decided last minute _ ." 

Tsukishima joined in and commented.

" _ Looks like he doesn't trust anyone in the court anymore. _ " 

What Tsukishima said made sense, yet at the same time, not. The Kenma he met along the alleyway was confident of Nekoma's coordination. That required trust, right? Yet why did Tsukishima's observation fit the current situation? Why was Kenma ragged and stressed when they were playing? Why were Kenma's fingers still shaking half an hour after the match?

So Hinata came up with a plan. To visit Kenma, because he's a dear friend and Hinata should have done this earlier after Kuroo's burial. But with the training of the new Karasuno members, and learning from Yachi's tutorials, Hinata was preoccupied. He can hear Kageyama shouting  _ 'Hinata, stupid!' _ in the background. 

Hinata shook his head sideways. There's nothing much he can do about it. Besides, he's in front of Kenma's home. His phone never rang new messages from Kenma at all. No backing out now. 

Kozume-san, ever the welcoming mother, greeted him. He visited Kenma at home once (two weeks before Kuroo died). There was a bit of surprise in her tone as she mentioned how Kenma didn't tell her he was visiting. Hinata saved the argument by making up an excuse of how it was a surprise visit even when it's not. Kenma's mother smiled and thanked him.

"Tetsu-kun may have left, but he left Kenma with a lot of good friends." She murmured.

_ Tetsu-kun? _

"Kuroo, I mean." Kozume-san stares forlornly on the stairs, "He used to visit every day, he was like our second son."

Hinata gripped the handle of his bag. Even Kozume-san was worried.

"I'm sure he meant much more to Kenma."

Hinata bowed and Kenma's mother directed which door was Kenma's room. He was quick in trudging up the stairs. He only thought of the possibility of Kenma asleep right after he barged in the room.

Kenma was not asleep at all.

In fact, Kenma looked like he never slept at all.

"Are you okay?!" Hinata gasped. 

He rushed towards Kenma after he shut the door behind him. Kenma, who was sitting on the floor, chair thrown in the corner. 

"Hey, Kenma." 

Hinata crouched and tapped the other lightly. It was dark, the only light emanating in the area was from the computer screen. 

This close, Hinata had to witness the degrading effects of grief in Kenma's physique. Eyebags protruding, cheekbones hollowed, bleached hair astray, and tangled. Hinata gently patted the blonde's head, hoping for some acknowledgment.

"Hey, I'm here."

That's when Kenma recognized him, shock plastered over his face. Well, Hinata deduced Kenma forgot their meet-up thirty minutes ago. What Hinata wasn't prepared for were the hot tears sliding down Kenma's cheeks.

"What happened?" Kenma slumped in Hinata's arms and cried harder. Hinata can feel the sharp hiccups from the setter's thin body. 

Kenma didn't answer, Hinata peeped at the computer screen. There was a VR headset beside the monitor, with wires and paraphernalia Hinata didn't remember Kenma had during his first visit.

Dread filled his instincts.

"What is it, Kenma?" 

Kenma was clutching his shirt, whispering something inaudible.

"Sorry, again?"

"I...I want him back."

Hinata's heart sank as Kenma pleaded. Kenma's throat croaked, his next words striking Hinata an ounce of what Kenma may have gone through since the ordeal of Kuroo's passing. 

"I'd sell everything," Kenma proclaimed louder. "I'd go to hell and back!" 

Hinata flinched from the tone. 

It's so wrong on so many levels. Desperation oozed from Kenma's eyes as he pulled away from Hinata. Kenma gaped at Hinata as if he had the power to bring forth miracles. 

"Take everything away from me, just  _ please _ ..."

He begged on shaking Hinata's arms, almost as if Kenma mistook him for a god. 

"...Please, let me have Kuro back."

The hairs of his skin stood up, his instincts screaming how Hinata was treading somewhere he's better off not knowing. 

"What did you do?" Slipped from Hinata's mouth. 

Kenma surveyed the whirring computer, and Hinata followed his gaze. The characters Hinata read earlier are never diminishing, rather only confirming the dangers of it.

**< Project Black Cat.exe crashed >**

**< Restart the program? >**

"I saw Kuro die again, Shouyou."

* * *

> **IV. Depression (Part 1)**

**_The key to understanding the stages is not to feel like you must go through every one of them, in precise order._ **

There were no issues with Kozume Kenma's projects gaining traction in the field. The nerve-wracking problem was the alarming success rate of a high school graduate student.

Kenma's proposals were duly accepted and entertained. His stock trading with BitCoin? Cryptocurrency he converts to money whenever necessary. His streamings online? Netizens were demanding more after Kenma uploaded his final recording. His small company for volleyball? He's the CEO sponsoring Hinata's overseas trips now. 

When Kenma submitted Project Black Cat onto several game developers, a few responded with interest. The prospect of virtual reality and artificial intelligence together will be a groundbreaking in the industry. Kenma signed a contract with a company with the most resources and great IT consultants. 

Kenma moved out of his house in Tokyo after being granted an apartment under his name. Benefits, alongside advanced equipment and technology to support his project. His parents didn't question his decision to not enter a university. Not when he nonchalantly announced how he was earning money and hired by a gaming company in his tender age.

Kuro always believed Kenma could achieve many great things. He's proud, Kenma did tell it to Kuro in a previous simulation. His reaction was priceless and beautiful. Something Kenma lived by to continue on. 

Project Black Cat was progressing tremendously too. With the additional software and upgrades in his system, Kenma's immersion was steady and hyperrealistic. 

Kuro's dialogues, gestures, and outfits, 100% accurate by his personality code. To the extent of an AI falling in love with the user, Kenma was pretty confident in the final version of the program. He requested privacy from his personal interactions with AI Kuro inside the virtual world. All Kenma had to write in his reports were the technicalities and bug fixes with the simulation. 

Once Kenma perfected the application, the formula of his work will be sold worldwide. The legal management will process his royalties and copyright. The marketing team had introduced his name in the industry too for hype.

There lie Kenma's frustrations. 

Kuro was buried two years ago, Project Black Cat initiated a year and a half ago. 

Kenma stripped off his customized VR headset. Breathing in, and breathing out. So far, the simulation was running green. He inputted the commands two days ago: Kuro as a young chemist professor in a university. 

Blame it on Kenma's idle longing for attending classes. The previous denominations on Kuro's life were:

a.) a Nekoma high school student - which was basically traveling back in time. Kuro also had memories of his long withstanding friendship with Kenma. The moment Kuro and Kenma arrived at the gymnasium, Kuro froze and died with the unlock of his memories as an AI. Project Black Cat crashed.

b.) a third-year high school student - Kenma wiped out AI Kuro's memories of their real-life connection. He had to start anew, and introducing himself again to Kuro was such a painful task. But Kuro took interest in him, and their friendship flamed again. The next thing Kenma knew, Kuro dragged him to play setter in the volleyball club. When Kenma tossed the ball, Kuro collapsed from the onslaught of information on how nothing was real in the world they're in. Project Black Cat crashed. 

c.) many more roles - ending with AI Kuro, based on the clever Kuroo Tetsurou, finding out their reality never went past 5D. Project Black Cat crashed.

Sometimes, Kuro asked him out on dates. Sometimes, they were only friends. 

Kenma uncapped his sign pen and scribbled in his notebook. The latest notes with Project Black Cat ver. 11.1.6.

**\- sexual stimulation: success**

**\- AI Kuro's character reaction had converted into sexual innuendo when hinted**

**\- is there a possibility of bringing in another user in VR?**

**\- cause of program crashing: undetermined**

At least, the sex was a complete success. In a previous simulation, Kuro and Kenma were dating. Kenma kissed him, but when Kuro kissed him back, Kenma didn't feel any sensation. He instantly reported the idea of sexual intercourse in the VR to the company. Luckily, they understood how the program needed to reach its maximum capabilities and taught Kenma how to connect his brain sexual receptors to the VR headset. 

Kuro was buried two years ago, Project Black Cat a year and a half ago. He made it this far yet this won't all matter if the program crashed again. 

His thoughts were disturbed by the doorbell beeping in staccato. His visitors were rare, at most, his high school friends were busy pursuing their careers like Kenma too. Hinata was supposed to stay in Brazil for longer.

"KENMAAAAAAA!" 

Why the hell was Bokuto Koutarou in his house?

* * *

Hinata was worried.

Before Hinata Shouyou's trip to Brazil, Bokuto received an invitation of sorts. A little reunion with the third gym squad before (Hinata emphasized if only they were available) they got busy again. Lev was on a vacation in Russia, but he did beg to send photos which they did. Tsukishima arrived with Hinata, the two obviously closer than the time they were playing as first years. 

The get-together was something Bokuto looked forward to, a means of also reconnecting with Akaashi. His volleyball career and Akaashi studying for literature barely had the moments to spare together. 

Hinata mentioned how he also asked Kenma to come, but the former Nekoma setter declined. Bokuto wished Kuroo was there with them, Kuroo would have brought Kenma with him. 

"After Kuroo....was gone, Kenma was even harder to reach out to." Bokuto sighed, stirring his iced coffee.

Tsukishima and Hinata glanced at each other. Akaashi immediately pointed out.

"Is something wrong?" 

"Uhhh...Tsukishima, I don't know what to say." Hinata frantically edged on his blonde friend. 

"You didn't even understand what Kozume said to you until you brought it up to me." Tsukishima rolled his eyes. 

"What did Kenma say?" Akaashi cut in.

"Has Kenma talked with any of you after Kuroo-san died?" Hinata queried, hopeful in his stare.

Bokuto wished he wouldn't disappoint the orange-head. 

"No, I'm sorry." Instead, he only hung his head.

Kuroo dying was hard, he was one of Bokuto's inspirations in volleyball. A part of him continued pursuing the sport as a career to dedicate it to his late best pal. Everything happened suddenly, the summer training camp, Nationals, and then hearing Kuroo fainting in one volleyball practice.

There were a lot of students at the funeral, and Kuroo's father gave a speech on how hard it was to bury his wife, and how harder it was to bury their child. His only silver lining was the fact that the mother and child were together in the afterlife. 

Kenma should have been there. Bokuto remembered how irritated he was when Kenma's parents went without their child. Akaashi had to hold his hand all the wake long to refrain Bokuto from lashing out. 

Kuroo would have appreciated it if his childhood best friend watched him in his final moments. Bokuto knew he would. Kenma just escaped from everything away. But, that was over two years ago, Bokuto understood each person deals with grief differently.

"What's wrong, Hinata?" Akaashi said, with a bit more force in his tone. Bokuto looked up and observed the former Karasuno High students.

"I don't know...Kenma was...He didn't tell me not to tell anyone but... _ ugh _ , I'm so worried. I'll leave soon to Brazil!" Hinata scratched his head. 

Akaashi stared at Tsukishima, demanding an explanation for Hinata's frustration.

"Hinata found out Kenma was playing with Kuroo," Tsukishima said, for the lack of better term.

From Tsukishima's account, he was suspicious when he visited Kenma's place once. He never pegged Kenma as a person who'd chat with strangers online, but then Kuroo died so maybe Kenma was lonely. From Hinata's account, he caught Kenma in a breakdown, spilling secrets of what he was doing since the funeral. 

There were many tech-savvy terms and jargons Hinata didn't comprehend. Only Kenma produced something on his computer that allows him to live with Kuroo. 

Akaashi showed them a concrete answer minutes later, an online article dubbed as:  **Tokyo High School Graduate Programmed Personalized AIs in Virtual Reality**

**_Kozume Kenma (19), CEO of Bouncing Ball Co. and also known as online streamer Kodzuken, developed..._ **

**_...Almost at its final stages..._ **

**_...The release of his work will change game technology and industry..._ **

**_...For privacy reasons, Kozume preferred a black cat icon as his profile picture._ **

"Hinata," Bokuto shuts his eyes after reading the article, Akaashi touches his arm. 

He connected the dots, information easily flowing to the only outcome for this disaster. Bokuto prayed to Kuroo's ghost that he'd forgive him for his next actions and maybe for his negligence too over Kuroo's special person.

"Where's Kenma residing now?"

Two years passed, and all Bokuto concluded was how Kozume Kenma brought Kuroo Tetsurou back from the dead.

* * *

"Is it true?" Bokuto strode in his house, not letting Kenma a chance to shut the door in front of him. 

Bokuto shouldn't be here. Out of everyone, Bokuto never contacted him since Kuro's...

Kenma shook his head, Kuro's here. Not physically, but still creating memories with him. Memories both of them were deprived of. 

Bokuto shoved him his phone, an online article about him circulating around the globe. The comments were positive, all supporting passionate youth gamers.

"You made a virtual reality where Kuroo's alive."

Okay, if Bokuto did not meet Kenma, this confrontation didn't need to happen. But then, Bokuto was Kuro's  _ bro _ , Kenma will yield a little respect despite how this was a blatant intrusion.

"What the fuck Kenma, are you playing with the dead?!" Bokuto shouted, and he flinched from the loudness of it rather than what Bokuto accused him of. 

"You didn't even come to his funeral two years ago!"

On second thought, Bokuto did not deserve any respect. 

"Get out." Kenma gritted his teeth.

"For Kuroo's sake,  _ please _ , do not disrespect his death."

"He's not dead!" Kenma exasperated. 

"Kenma!" Bokuto gasped.

"Physically dead, yes! But I can still talk to Kuro, touch Kuro. And I'm sharing the means of how to do that to the world, can't you be proud of me?" 

Maybe asking Bokuto to be proud of his work was such a big thing to ask. 

"You think Kuroo will be proud of what you did after his death?" Bokuto sneered. 

Kenma, in his recollection of Bokuto's character from Kuro's testimonies, figured Bokuto wasn't the hot-headed type. Maybe Bokuto was stuck in the anger stage of grief. 

"You weren't smart enough..." Kenma muttered under his breath.

Bokuto scrunched his eyebrows at him. Kenma decided to help Bokuto with his grieving process. Kuroo will want him to do that for Bokuto. 

"You aren't smart enough to create a world for him."

Bokuto's golden eyes, similar to Kenma's, widened and froze. Bokuto had his mouth hung open, no more accusations spewing from him. 

"Are you smart enough, Bokuto?" Kenma taunted, his truth as cruel as it can be. 

"I am the mind of Nekoma, and Nekoma only exists with Kuro in it."

  
  


Akaashi barged in, later on, apologizing profusely for Bokuto's impulsive behavior. Before their discussion reached its conclusion, Akaashi dragged Bokuto away. 

Judging from the conflicted expression on Bokuto's face, his offer occupied the guy. 

" _ You miss Kuro, don't you? I'll let you talk to him again. _ "

An hour later, Kenma's phone pinged a message. 

**From: Unknown Number**

**Just this once, I want to thank him**

**\- B**

Kenma stretched from his chair and reviewed his list, he can cross off the possibility of bringing in another person in the simulation soon. 

Kenma tapped his AI application and dialed Kuro. He wondered if Kuro was teaching other classes at the university. Or what Kuro does if Kenma wasn't in the simulation. 

After three consecutive rings, AI Kuro picked up the call. Voice smooth and silky as ever. 

“The childhood friends in my story already had an ending." Kenma declared.

“Pray tell,” Kuro replied. 

“The one who died...knew they’re in an illusionary world. He finds out it’s fake and begs the other to return to the reality where he’s not alive.”

Kenma will damn every route to escape its ending. 

“Isn’t that how it should go?” Kuro reiterated. 

Silence filled for a minute until Kenma firmed on his goal for Project Black Cat version 11.1.6. 

“I want to give them a happy ending where the other didn’t find out.”

* * *

**IV. Depression (Part 2)**

**_There are two types of depression that are associated with mourning. The first one is a reaction to practical implications relating to the loss._ **

**_The second type of depression is more subtle and, in a sense, perhaps more private._ **

The trial simulation with Bokuto was a success, at least by Kenma's standards.

Kenma wrote in his full-detailed report of what transpired with Bokuto and Kuro inside the virtual world. Kuro adapted to Bokuto's character, as expected of their real-life friendship compatibility. Kenma and his theory of the 'volleyball' being a trigger word to Project Black Cat crashing, was once again proven. 

Kuro glitched for a moment back there, when Bokuto mentioned volleyball. Kenma had to chase holes in the program afterward and patch it before all hell broke loose for the nth time. 

Kenma was diagnosing the entire system for God knows how long. He scourges throughout the codes and symbols in the program, nitpicking any loose thread that might set off the project's self-destruction. 

So far, his search was fruitless. 

The simulation with Bokuto may be a step higher, but also dragged him two steps down from the project. If only Kenma's precious effort and time to chase a spark that might crash the program was spent on the VR instead, then maybe he'd at least be a bit happier than what was occurring right now in his reality. 

Bokuto was such an idiot, rattling off 'volleyball' to Kuro accidentally. Kenma would have loved to snap at the  _ soon-to-be professional volleyball athlete _ after trial. But when Kenma exited the program, finding Bokuto dazed and solemn with a VR headset in his hands, Kenma couldn't find himself to raise his voice over what happened.

Kenma let him go, no words exchanged in between. 

Bokuto's best friend (or lover,  _ ugh, they're complicated! _ ), had differing opinions. 

Akaashi dropped off frequently after their dramatic reunion of fetching an angry Bokuto from his house. Akaashi brought him take-out lunch, as a peace offering. Kenma didn't let him in the house, Akaashi never pushed boundaries either. Akaashi did this every other day, and Kenma deduced that Hinata loosened his tongue during their little get-together before Hinata's trip. 

If Akaashi wants to make up for Bokuto's outburst by treating him to free food then Kenma will accept without complaints. Akaashi will soon feel like he has done his part and let Kenma do what he wants without prying. Akaashi was a kind soul, and Kenma was too cruel for this world. 

Kenma didn't mind Akaashi's quick visits, until today.

"What did you do, Kenma?"

Akaashi invited himself in with no food boxes for Kenma,  _ oh well, that didn't last long.  _

"What is this monstrous thing you have created?" 

Akaashi's temper was like ice, sharp, and perilous. 

"It is monstrous,  _ that  _ I accept. I don't care what I become, Akaashi."

Unlike Bokuto, his argument with Akaashi never had raising voices only steely glares. 

Maybe Kenma can elaborate on his own feelings much better. Akaashi's the type to listen and hear out people. 

"A world without Kuro was something I cannot accept and live in." Kenma admitted, "I had to make amends with my reality, so a world where I can still see Kuro..."

"...For that, I'd compromise."

It took a second for Akaashi Keiji to tick off like a bomb. 

"You don't even know how this affects other people!"

_ Oh, so this is all about your dear Bokuto-san now? _

"Trust me,  _ I know. _ " Kenma explained like Akaashi was a seven-year-old boy, calmly and beguiling.

"I've been here for many cycles, meeting every type of Kuro in this world. Holding him as he dies, because he always would."

"You should stop." Akaashi retorted.

"Kuro told me that too." Kenma bit back.

"In the virtual or the real one?"

"Doesn't matter. He always called me stubborn."

Does it ever matter which Kuro told Kenma that?

"Suit yourself, Kozume-san. Never ask Koutarou to come in that world of yours again."

Akaashi leaves shuts the door with a bang. Kenma flinched from the noise, not the thought of drawing the line to people who were reaching out to him.

Not from that thought at all. 

* * *

> **V. Acceptance**

**_Please keep in mind that everyone grieves differently._ **

The application of Project Black Cat installed on his phone was for tracking purposes. Kenma can't enter the VR with his phone alone, but he can communicate with Kuro there. Kuro presumes it was all text messages and calls in his side, while Kenma reminisces of his time playing dating simulations with more freedom of what to say. 

Call it chatbot or what other people may name but this was Kenma's Kuro, the same Kuro who asks him to not forget eating, the same Kuro who smiled when Kenma was not alone, the same Kuro who holds his hand whenever he's lost.

When the application blared out an alert: < **Project Black Cat Detected Harm: Level 1 >** . Kenma prayed he'd arrive at a different scenario, other than Kenma shaking as he wore his VR headset and dived in the simulation with Kuro fading in his arms. 

_ I should've spent more time there with him. I was too busy wallowing in my sadness when I could have asked Kuro for comfort.  _

The gods never pity, they were as cruel as Kenma could be. 

The problem with an AI especially personalized from Kuroo Tetsurou, was that he was ridiculously smart. Kuro can read people like reading blocks in volleyball, too observant but blind to his own downfall. 

Even at Kuro's last minute, Project Black Cat crashed with AI Kuro utilizing it for his creator. 

Kenma was crying in front of his bright white monitor, Kuro's last words blinking on his screen.

**< i love you >**

Then, the line Kenma expected to read but ached each time:

**< Project Black Cat.exe crashed >**

Kenma barely heard Akaashi’s footsteps, dropping off another bento box by his front door. His town was a quiet and secluded location, They never interacted again, but Kenma supposed the food was for reconciliation. Akaashi seemed to be a person who also reigned in emotions, any outbursts would break their own principle.

Not that Kenma cared. 

Akaashi blamed him for Bokuto being a wreck. Akaashi should have congratulated him, Kenma was able to reunite Bokuto and Kuro again. Shouldn't Akaashi be glad?

There was a crashing sound outside his house. Kenma got off his chair and opened his curtains wide. He immediately identified its source: a black cat beside the broken potted plant Kenma's mother gifted when he moved out. 

The cat licked its paws and stretched its head to a tittering stare towards him. 

Like the black cat was judging Kenma. 

_ Those slitted green eyes looked familiar... _

"Fuck!"

His computer pinged a notification from his email. Kenma leaped to his chair, clicking his inboxes. The mail from one of his IT consultants at the game programming company. A professional Kenma deemed worthy to express his concerns about his ongoing project.

**_Mr. Kozume_ **

**_I apologize for the late reply. I have reviewed your notes from your previous simulation and also read again the codes of your project which you first submitted._ **

**_Our long withstanding problem was how volatile the program was. I think I may have found the source of it._ **

**_While nitpicking your code in the terminal, I found a hole of sorts, maybe like a virus of small scale which interrupted the optimization._ **

**_Check the modeling structures of your Artificial Intelligence again._ **

**_Regards_ **

Kenma glanced at his windows, sunshine hidden by the gray clouds. The cat who broke his potted plant jumped to the wall of another house, never sparing Kenma any other judging gaze.

Kenma should have known better. 

He clicked his terminal for Project Black Cat, binary code, and several command shortcuts displayed. He scrolls towards AI Kuro's designated part. He examined the scaling of AI Kuro's three-dimensional figure in the software. 

There it was. The fucking mole. 

All modeled from the pictures in the flash drive Tsukishima handed over two years ago.

His heart pounded as Kenma pulled his drawer out, plucked Kuro's flash drive, and jacked it in the USB port.

**< KT's Mass Storage Device in, scan for viruses? >**

**> Yes. **

**< Virus detected in KT's Mass Storage >**

"Even in death, your stupid flash drive still stops me huh." Kenma's mouth ran dry. 

All his problems, all the crashing, all of Kuro dying in his arms in the stupid simulation Kenma created for their future...all of those preventing Kenma from his ultimate goal.

All of those were still work of the one and only Kuroo Tetsurou. 

**> Run diagnostics**

"Kuro..." 

**< Warning: Terminating the virus in the flash drive will delete all the corrupted files. >**

"So this is how it is..." Kenma thought his tears from the Project Black Cat ver. 11.1.6 was over. 

No, the lump in his throat and the tears threatening to spill over again...this was not for the project anymore.

**< Continue or Cancel > **

A choice between his old memories with Kuro or the possibility of creating new memories with Kuro. 

This was for the future Kenma signed up for. 

"You'll never stop me." Kenma will tell Kuro in the next simulation that something salty was his favorite flavor

**> Cancel.**

"I will win this rigged game, no matter how long it takes."

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Leave kudos and comments below if you like it!  
> Follow my twitter account [@ziasann](https://twitter.com/ziasann) for more HQ memes and shenanigans.  
> Subscribe to my tumblr account [ziasann](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/ziasann) for more HQ drabbles and stories.
> 
> P.S.: I was really really sad when I posted this.


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